Random Thoughts Lifted From Other Blogs
1)Those who cam up with the term “ebonics” were very accurate, though not the way they thought. Their meaning is a combination of ebony and phonics, hence ebonics.
But if one looks closer, the term “ebonics” IS perfect, since it is a combination of the names of two plagues - ebola and bubonic. And how appropriate is that, since it will ravage American education. (ED - U - KAY - SHIN).
2)"If you're democrat, you think this country is what's wrong with the world.
And, if you're republican, you think this country is what's right with the world. "- coolhandluke12 AnkleBitingPundents
3)The Big Pharaoh Hi, I am from Egypt. I would like to use this blog in making my voice heard. I hope you enjoy the stuff I write here. Please don't forget to add this blog to your favorites.
Thursday, July 14, 2005
The Idiot's Guide to a Better World
The world would be a much better place if:
Muslims heed the following:
- The so-called Shariah law or Islamic law is a set of laws that were promulgated hundreds upon hundreds of years ago. We simply cannot live by a lot of these laws today. Such laws were for specific people who lived in a specific time. Without changing the basic tenets of Islam, Islamic law should be reformed so that it suits the year 2005 and not 1005.
- Killing innocents in the name of Islam is wrong. No buts, no ifs, no ummms.
- Allah does not give a dead rat's ass about a girl's hair. If you're sexually excited when you see a girl's hairs then you're the sick pervert. Hijab is not a fard (obligation). It does not add or decrease the "good points" that a girl gets when she makes it to heaven. Perceived verses about women's covering were for the women of the year 620 AD. I assure you they were living in a very, and I mean very, different environment than the women of today. To sum up, Allah is not as dumb as to care about a piece of cloth on a girl's head.
- The funny creatures called non-Muslims living in Muslim dominated countries are to have equal right. Their rights should not come from the Quran, the Bible, or the Buddha Book. They should come from the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.
- Muslims who convert out of Islam to become whatever they want to become should not get killed. They also have the right to make their decision public even in downtown Riyadh.
- Authors have the right to express their opinions freely even if they wrote books that would make Salman Rushdie look like a pious Muslim. They should not get arrested and they should definitely not get killed. Writers are free to criticize the Christian faith in the West; the same should be with Islam's Voltaires.
- A Muslim is a Muslim in his house, among his kids, and in his mosque and NOT on the streets. A Muslim should not force his own interpretation of religion on others. The idea that Islam is a religion and a state should be dumped in one of New York's garbage dumps. In the year 2005, in the age of Bill Gates and invading Mars, there is nothing called a state that is based upon a religion. All religions in the state should be respected and all should live and let live.
- Israel is not going anywhere so live with it. Accepting that fact would make you feel better.
Christians heed the following:
- God does not give a dead rat's ass about those zillion denominations. A Christian can have communion in any church he bumps into. Any priest/pastor/bishop/etc who refuses a person because of his denomination should get kicked out of church.
- The teachings of Jesus are enough. In fact, the world would be paradise if all humans actually managed to do everything that Jesus said. So no need for the zillion so called teachings of "church founders", "saints", etc.
- The orthodox and catholic church should allow divorce. The sight of Egyptian orthodox women filling up psychiatrist clinics because they find it hard living with their husbands is not cool at all.
- There is nothing, and I mean nothing, in the Bible that says "Thou shall not use condoms". Are you reading this blog pope?
- Confessions in the catholic and orthodox churched should be abolished. A priest is just as human as you are. The idea that he has more power or authority than you is nonsense. You can enter a seminary, live for some years in a monastery, and surprise you become a priest!
- There is nothing wrong with women preaching, period. A female bishop is just as good as a male bishop. If a woman can rule a country then she can definitely work in a church.
Jews heed the following:
- Hasidic and ultra-orthodox Jews are not necessary the best Jews around. All Jews who follow the basic tenants of Judaism are as good. Wearing black hats all day and adopting harsh kosher laws won't earn you any points. God, ops I mean G-d, looks at the heart, besides, he cares more than your clothes or your dietary habits.
- Saturday is for G-d. If you're not planning to go to the synagogue or you're not planning to spend some time with G-d at home, then go to work and make yourself useful.
- Gaza and the entire West Bank belong to the Palestinians, period. All Israelis living in Gaza and the West Bank should move to Tel Aviv and Ascalon. The idea that this land belongs to the Jews is nonsense. What would you do with the millions of Palestinians there, pray 24/7 that they vanish? Those Jews who believe that all settlers must go are NOT less Jewish than the others.
- The Haram al-Sharif or the Temple Mount is a Muslim area, period. Even if you believe that it's the holiest site in Judaism, that won't really change anything. The Temple Mount belongs to the Palestinians and the Western Wall belongs to the Jews. Jerusalem should be shared. What is Muslim and Christian is Palestinian and what is Jewish is Israeli. Where did I get this from? From the Bill Clinton plan, the best solution so far.
4) "The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fucked."-Quote from Braveheart; Stephen, the Irish Fighter (David O'Hara) to William Wallace (Mel Gibson
5)"You're either with us, or you're with the enemy" -G.W. Bush
6)"Here...drink your Kool-aid, lay back and look at the pretty black helicopters"
7)Liberal Bumber Sticker: “I’m already against the next war.”
8)The liberals always have to use nice words for everything;
They are not terrorists they are the insurgency.
They are not illegal aliens they are undocumented aliens.
He didn’t commit rape, he sexually assaulted her.
They are not liberals, they are progressives.
Everything bad has a good name with liberals.
9) "I thought Linda Lovelace made a far more convincing Deep Throat than Mark Felt. They both screwed everyone around them, but at least she wasn't ashamed to show her face".-Anonymous Person Who is NOT Liberal Larry/ BlameBush
10) The Nobel Peace Prize is now on the level of a gold star given to a kindergarden student to soothe an ego.
11) Quotes by Gen. Paul Tibbits pilot of the Enola Gay to Studs Terkle, Aug. 6. 2002, from The Guardian Unlimited (uk newspaper)
ST: One big question. Since September 11, what are your thoughts? People talk about nukes, the hydrogen bomb.
PT: Let's put it this way. I don't know any more about these terrorists than you do, I know nothing. When they bombed the Trade Centre I couldn't believe what was going on. We've fought many enemies at different times. But we knew who they were and where they were. These people, we don't know who they are or where they are. That's the point that bothers me. Because they're gonna strike again, I'll put money on it. And it's going to be damned dramatic. But they're gonna do it in their own sweet time. We've got to get into a position where we can kill the bastards. None of this business of taking them to court, the hell with that. I wouldn't waste five seconds on them.
ST: One last thing, when you hear people say, "Let's nuke 'em," "Let's nuke these people," what do you think?
PT: Oh, I wouldn't hesitate if I had the choice. I'd wipe 'em out. You're gonna kill innocent people at the same time, but we've never fought a damn war anywhere in the world where they didn't kill innocent people. If the newspapers would just cut out the shit: "You've killed so many civilians." That's their tough luck for being there.
12)If someone threatens the President's life, it's taken seroiusly. Talk of killing the masses in the name of "allah" should be taken just as seriously. People (esp. the mainstream media outlets) have to be responsible for what they say right now
But if one looks closer, the term “ebonics” IS perfect, since it is a combination of the names of two plagues - ebola and bubonic. And how appropriate is that, since it will ravage American education. (ED - U - KAY - SHIN).
2)"If you're democrat, you think this country is what's wrong with the world.
And, if you're republican, you think this country is what's right with the world. "- coolhandluke12 AnkleBitingPundents
3)The Big Pharaoh Hi, I am from Egypt. I would like to use this blog in making my voice heard. I hope you enjoy the stuff I write here. Please don't forget to add this blog to your favorites.
Thursday, July 14, 2005
The Idiot's Guide to a Better World
The world would be a much better place if:
Muslims heed the following:
- The so-called Shariah law or Islamic law is a set of laws that were promulgated hundreds upon hundreds of years ago. We simply cannot live by a lot of these laws today. Such laws were for specific people who lived in a specific time. Without changing the basic tenets of Islam, Islamic law should be reformed so that it suits the year 2005 and not 1005.
- Killing innocents in the name of Islam is wrong. No buts, no ifs, no ummms.
- Allah does not give a dead rat's ass about a girl's hair. If you're sexually excited when you see a girl's hairs then you're the sick pervert. Hijab is not a fard (obligation). It does not add or decrease the "good points" that a girl gets when she makes it to heaven. Perceived verses about women's covering were for the women of the year 620 AD. I assure you they were living in a very, and I mean very, different environment than the women of today. To sum up, Allah is not as dumb as to care about a piece of cloth on a girl's head.
- The funny creatures called non-Muslims living in Muslim dominated countries are to have equal right. Their rights should not come from the Quran, the Bible, or the Buddha Book. They should come from the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.
- Muslims who convert out of Islam to become whatever they want to become should not get killed. They also have the right to make their decision public even in downtown Riyadh.
- Authors have the right to express their opinions freely even if they wrote books that would make Salman Rushdie look like a pious Muslim. They should not get arrested and they should definitely not get killed. Writers are free to criticize the Christian faith in the West; the same should be with Islam's Voltaires.
- A Muslim is a Muslim in his house, among his kids, and in his mosque and NOT on the streets. A Muslim should not force his own interpretation of religion on others. The idea that Islam is a religion and a state should be dumped in one of New York's garbage dumps. In the year 2005, in the age of Bill Gates and invading Mars, there is nothing called a state that is based upon a religion. All religions in the state should be respected and all should live and let live.
- Israel is not going anywhere so live with it. Accepting that fact would make you feel better.
Christians heed the following:
- God does not give a dead rat's ass about those zillion denominations. A Christian can have communion in any church he bumps into. Any priest/pastor/bishop/etc who refuses a person because of his denomination should get kicked out of church.
- The teachings of Jesus are enough. In fact, the world would be paradise if all humans actually managed to do everything that Jesus said. So no need for the zillion so called teachings of "church founders", "saints", etc.
- The orthodox and catholic church should allow divorce. The sight of Egyptian orthodox women filling up psychiatrist clinics because they find it hard living with their husbands is not cool at all.
- There is nothing, and I mean nothing, in the Bible that says "Thou shall not use condoms". Are you reading this blog pope?
- Confessions in the catholic and orthodox churched should be abolished. A priest is just as human as you are. The idea that he has more power or authority than you is nonsense. You can enter a seminary, live for some years in a monastery, and surprise you become a priest!
- There is nothing wrong with women preaching, period. A female bishop is just as good as a male bishop. If a woman can rule a country then she can definitely work in a church.
Jews heed the following:
- Hasidic and ultra-orthodox Jews are not necessary the best Jews around. All Jews who follow the basic tenants of Judaism are as good. Wearing black hats all day and adopting harsh kosher laws won't earn you any points. God, ops I mean G-d, looks at the heart, besides, he cares more than your clothes or your dietary habits.
- Saturday is for G-d. If you're not planning to go to the synagogue or you're not planning to spend some time with G-d at home, then go to work and make yourself useful.
- Gaza and the entire West Bank belong to the Palestinians, period. All Israelis living in Gaza and the West Bank should move to Tel Aviv and Ascalon. The idea that this land belongs to the Jews is nonsense. What would you do with the millions of Palestinians there, pray 24/7 that they vanish? Those Jews who believe that all settlers must go are NOT less Jewish than the others.
- The Haram al-Sharif or the Temple Mount is a Muslim area, period. Even if you believe that it's the holiest site in Judaism, that won't really change anything. The Temple Mount belongs to the Palestinians and the Western Wall belongs to the Jews. Jerusalem should be shared. What is Muslim and Christian is Palestinian and what is Jewish is Israeli. Where did I get this from? From the Bill Clinton plan, the best solution so far.
4) "The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fucked."-Quote from Braveheart; Stephen, the Irish Fighter (David O'Hara) to William Wallace (Mel Gibson
5)"You're either with us, or you're with the enemy" -G.W. Bush
6)"Here...drink your Kool-aid, lay back and look at the pretty black helicopters"
7)Liberal Bumber Sticker: “I’m already against the next war.”
8)The liberals always have to use nice words for everything;
They are not terrorists they are the insurgency.
They are not illegal aliens they are undocumented aliens.
He didn’t commit rape, he sexually assaulted her.
They are not liberals, they are progressives.
Everything bad has a good name with liberals.
9) "I thought Linda Lovelace made a far more convincing Deep Throat than Mark Felt. They both screwed everyone around them, but at least she wasn't ashamed to show her face".-Anonymous Person Who is NOT Liberal Larry/ BlameBush
10) The Nobel Peace Prize is now on the level of a gold star given to a kindergarden student to soothe an ego.
11) Quotes by Gen. Paul Tibbits pilot of the Enola Gay to Studs Terkle, Aug. 6. 2002, from The Guardian Unlimited (uk newspaper)
ST: One big question. Since September 11, what are your thoughts? People talk about nukes, the hydrogen bomb.
PT: Let's put it this way. I don't know any more about these terrorists than you do, I know nothing. When they bombed the Trade Centre I couldn't believe what was going on. We've fought many enemies at different times. But we knew who they were and where they were. These people, we don't know who they are or where they are. That's the point that bothers me. Because they're gonna strike again, I'll put money on it. And it's going to be damned dramatic. But they're gonna do it in their own sweet time. We've got to get into a position where we can kill the bastards. None of this business of taking them to court, the hell with that. I wouldn't waste five seconds on them.
ST: One last thing, when you hear people say, "Let's nuke 'em," "Let's nuke these people," what do you think?
PT: Oh, I wouldn't hesitate if I had the choice. I'd wipe 'em out. You're gonna kill innocent people at the same time, but we've never fought a damn war anywhere in the world where they didn't kill innocent people. If the newspapers would just cut out the shit: "You've killed so many civilians." That's their tough luck for being there.
12)If someone threatens the President's life, it's taken seroiusly. Talk of killing the masses in the name of "allah" should be taken just as seriously. People (esp. the mainstream media outlets) have to be responsible for what they say right now
posted by Shelby Beauregard at 9:02 PM
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